"Anything" Prayer, Epilepsy-Slough Of Despond
I think it was seventh grade, when God seemed to ask me if I'd really want Him to do ANYTHING in my life to make a difference to me, as I'd seen in others' lives who had vibrant testimonies. Usually they were saved as adults, & they had a 180 degree change in their lives. I was scared stiff because I knew deep in my heart He'd take me up on my word, but after a long heart-battle, I told him Yes, I was willing for ANYTHING. That prayer was confirmed in high school & in college too.
The WAY God answers prayer is often VERY DIFFERENT from what we had in mind. When you pray an "anything" prayer, God will start, I think, by BREAKING you to be what He wants you to be...and that can be very painful.
I told you I asked God to work in my life--no matter what it took--to make Christianity real to me. That was 8th grade. In the 9th grade, I was told I had an epileptic condition I'd been born with that showed up in adolescence. My emotional response was VERY negative.
In three years I found everything around me crumbling: good habits--like brushing my teeth & washing my face in the morning--disappeared; my formerly bright personality got bitter & pessimistic; my withdrawing into myself led to--I think--losing my many friends; & my straight-A average in school slipped to having B's--and I remember one C.
My Mom referred to this time as my "Slough of Despond" (from Pilgrim's Progress). So things most girls learn during their teen years are difficult for me--
who never had those experiences since I was in a shell most of those years. This may sound funny, but I think I used to be a cute little girl--my mother told me once she thought I'd grow up to be pretty, but by the time I was of college age, I'd stopped caring for myself and become an overweight girl with greasy hair & poor sense of personal grooming.
(Yup; the team photo above was taken during our furlough in Oak Park, MI; #22 is Yours Truly. And the family posing in front of the living room piano--that's me in front of Dad & Mom.)
The WAY God answers prayer is often VERY DIFFERENT from what we had in mind. When you pray an "anything" prayer, God will start, I think, by BREAKING you to be what He wants you to be...and that can be very painful.
I told you I asked God to work in my life--no matter what it took--to make Christianity real to me. That was 8th grade. In the 9th grade, I was told I had an epileptic condition I'd been born with that showed up in adolescence. My emotional response was VERY negative.
In three years I found everything around me crumbling: good habits--like brushing my teeth & washing my face in the morning--disappeared; my formerly bright personality got bitter & pessimistic; my withdrawing into myself led to--I think--losing my many friends; & my straight-A average in school slipped to having B's--and I remember one C.My Mom referred to this time as my "Slough of Despond" (from Pilgrim's Progress). So things most girls learn during their teen years are difficult for me--
who never had those experiences since I was in a shell most of those years. This may sound funny, but I think I used to be a cute little girl--my mother told me once she thought I'd grow up to be pretty, but by the time I was of college age, I'd stopped caring for myself and become an overweight girl with greasy hair & poor sense of personal grooming.(Yup; the team photo above was taken during our furlough in Oak Park, MI; #22 is Yours Truly. And the family posing in front of the living room piano--that's me in front of Dad & Mom.)
Labels: Family on the Field
posted by Life in Koriyama @ 8:13 AM
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